Chapter 14 – Roof Jumping!
Within the magical community, when a boy wanted to impress a girl, he would give her prized magical weapons or rare grimoires as a present. No one gave flowers or the like–things which looked good but were ultimately useless. That’s why when Chen Dawei gave flowers to Lizz, she was clueless as to the significance behind the gift.
However, for Zhang Shaoyu, the reason was as clear as day. He took a deep breath while glaring angrily at Chen Dawei. What!? How dare this old fart do this right in front of my face! Was yesterday not enough?
Zhang Shaoyu was going to give Chen Dawei a piece of his mind, when Lizz, though extremely reluctant to speak to the old man, spoke up. “Why are you giving me flowers? These things are useless! Just go shove them somewhere.”
Zhang Shaoyu immediately deflated with relief. Although this girl lacks common sense, she’s really devoted!
Chen Dawei was stunned by the immediate refusal. His books on ‘how to pick up girls’ told him that girls were susceptible to flowers, and giving flowers had always worked for him before. Who’d ever have thought that such a large number of flowers would fail to impress this goddess? A girl who didn’t even raise an eyebrow at such a gesture was rare indeed, but this only further fueled Chen Dawei’s desire.
Putting aside his anger, Chen Dawei smiled as he withdrew the flowers and boasted proudly, “Young lady, don’t you know? Yesterday, I went and bought a huge flower garden up north to get those flowers for you. It was so large that it took me two hours just to drive one round around it.”
Zhang Shaoyu resentfully thought himself, This old bastard, can’t win with small things so you’re trying with big ones now? But… Will this move Lizz’s heart?
Zhang Shaoyu felt more than a little anxious and peeked at Lizz out of the corner of his eye, trying to glance at her reaction, but she simply smiled and said happily, “Ah! I know, I used to have such a crappy car too.”
Zhang Shaoyu couldn’t help but laugh at that. He lost control of himself so completely that after just a few seconds, Chen Dawei’s face was covered with saliva.
Chen Dawei nearly fainted after hearing such a response, and his mind ground to a halt. He was at a loss as to what he should do. He just stood there, being ridiculed by Zhang Shaoyu, even as he felt like ripping the boy’s corpse into thirteen pieces.
Lizz looked at Zhang Shaoyu curiously and asked him, “Shaoyu, why are you laughing so hard? Did I say something funny?”
Zhang Shaoyu tried to pull himself together as he wiped his tears and said, “No, nothing, there’s nothing wrong, you said nothing wrong!”
Lizz didn’t know what the matter was, but after hearing Shaoyu, for some reason she couldn’t fathom, Lizz felt happy. She took Shaoyu’s arm and said while swinging it playfully, “Why don’t you praise me then!”
Zhang Shaoyu smiled and patted Lizz’s head while praising her. “My Lizz is so smart and beautiful!”
Lizz pushed Shaoyu away. “Who’s your Lizz? Nope! Shameless!” she laughed.
Looking at how close the two were with each other, Chen Dawei felt extremely jealous. He stared at Zhang Shaoyu with a dark expression upon his face, as if he was trying to crush him into smithereens.(1)
“You two stinking brats dare to stand before this old lady, huh!?” The moment was interrupted by the voice of the female boss coming from behind them.
The moment Lizz saw the female boss closing in, she ignored Chen Dawei completely and tugged on Zhang Shaoyu’s sleeve, saying, “Shaoyu, let’s get going, otherwise those three oldies will catch up to us.”
“Okay!” Zhang Shaoyu nodded and summoned the courage to hold Lizz’s hand. He didn’t even give Chen Dawei a second glance as they started running away.(2)
It was the first time a boy held her hand, and even though Lizz felt a bit uncomfortable, she didn’t feel like letting go. So, she squeezed his hand tighter and the two continued running, hand in hand.
Watching the disappearing figure of the beautiful Lizz, Chen Dawei felt so entranced that he had the sudden urge to just leap on her right then and there.
“Hey, fucking old bastard! Get outta my way!” Right at that moment, Chen Dawei heard a voice like a tigress’ roar. Unable to react in time, someone kicked his butt and he fell face first onto the ground. The impact left him with a bleeding nose and a body covered in dirt, just like a dog.
Chen Dawei was just about to explode into vulgarities at the person who had knocked him down, but he found that she was already gone. He couldn’t even see the figure of the person that kicked him, seeing how she disappeared with not even a trace. Chen Dawei was left alone in surprise and confusion, saying, “She’s running so fast… Was that Liu Xiang?”(3)
As Zhang Shaoyu and Lizz continued to run, Zhang Shaoyu looked behind them and saw, to his consternation, that the old lady’s group was catching up. “What is this? How did they manage to get such a boost during that whole ‘teacher’ talk? They must be running like the wind! Did they stop to dope up? That’s against the rules!”
Lizz also glanced behind, and being much more experienced than Shaoyu, she assessed the situation. She looked at the three’s legs, and was surprised to see something resembling green threads hovering around them. She opened her eyes wide in surprise as she thought to herself, Is that speed-enhancing magic? They can’t be mages, how can they use something like that? Don’t tell me there’s someone helping them?
Lizz began to ponder the possibilities as soon as she came to this realization, losing all intention of standing them down right then and there. Based on the assumption that there was some unknown helper, they needed to escape as soon as possible. After all, fighting against a capable and hidden helper was definitely not to their favor.
With that in mind, she looked at Zhang Shaoyu and wondered, Could it be that he told me not to fight them because he realized this unknown enemy was in hiding, and he was worried that I would be defeated…? ……Yeah! That’s how it is! After all, he swallowed the Sacred Blood Stone, so having magnificent insight isn’t that surprising! I’ll have to pay more attention to what he says.
Meanwhile, Zhang Shaoyu ran with all of his might, chased by people carrying butcher knives, not even sparing a thought to anything else other than running for his life. But the moment he looked behind him, he saw that the old people were closing in. Now, there was only approximately thirty or forty meters between them. How is this possible?! I’m running as fast as I can, but I can’t get away! What’s with these oldies?! Is it Tai Chi?! Did Liu Xiang do Tai Chi everyday too?
Zhang Shaoyu’s imagination was running wild when Lizz shouted at him, “Shaoyu, run faster, they are going to catch up to us soon!”
Zhang Shaoyu thought, It’s useless to run around aimlessly like this. We need to find a hiding place before they catch up. But where can we hide?
Zhang Shaoyu observed his surroundings, and soon, a certain familiar building entered his field of vision. “It’s the school!” Left with no other choice, he thought, At this juncture, there’s nothing else to it but to hope that it won’t turn out like with those low IQ punks from earlier! Zhang Shaoyu wasted no more time thinking and ran towards the school with Lizz in tow.
It was time for afternoon classes at school, and Zhang Shaoyu saw many students gushing towards the gate. There were also a lot of students’ cars trying to get into the school. The students from this school were quite despicable. Whenever it stroked their fancy, those rich kids would just drive their cars to school to show off.
The entire gate was flooded with people and cars. Unable to enter, Zhang Shaoyu was forced to stop. If it goes on like this, we’ll get chopped down before getting in!
“Tch! These lowly animals!” Zhang Shaoyu gritted his teeth in annoyance. Within the next moment, he had swept Lizz up in his arms and jumped on top of a car’s roof. Like those practicing ‘the art of light footsteps’ in martial arts, Zhang Shaoyu started leaping over the heads of his audience. But instead of stepping on stones in a river, he was stepping on the luxurious cars’ roofs. Due to the effects of the Sacred Blood Stone, every step he took left a deep dent on top of a cars’ roof. Of course, his behavior attracted a lot of cursing.
The three old pursuers saw this, and not wanting to be outdone, they followed Zhang Shaoyu using the same method.
The students watching the scene were staring in such surprise their eyeballs popped out. What the fuck, didn’t that Zhang Shaoyu just do a 10600 somersault earlier today? And now he’s holding a girl while flying all around? This guy is so hardcore!(4)
“Oh my God! Am I dreaming? Since when did these people really exist in this world?!”
“What kind of man is he? D. Gray? Naruto? Ultraman?”
“Hey! Aren’t the first two way too different from the last one?”
“Wait! I know the three old people chasing him. Isn’t that the owner from the stew restaurant at Huang Street and two of her workers? I’ve been there so many times but I never knew that the three of them were martial arts masters!”
“Who’d ever thought such hidden talents were hiding in our very own Nan Jiang City!(5) Appearances can be deceiving after all!”
At the school gate, a pompous boy could be seen standing surrounded by girls as he leaned on his black Porsche. “Ladies… This is my new car, the famous Porsche 911, and it was only nine hundred and ninety-eight…” said the guy as he approached the more beautiful girls in the class, “…million. Want to go for a ride with me after school?”
The girls were excited and ready to raise their hands and say “I do!”, when suddenly a loud ‘bang’ could be heard coming from on top of the pompous guy’s car. The crowd looked up to see Zhang Shaoyu holding Lizz while yelling, “Out of the way!” as he jumped away and ran straight for the school like Superman. The figure stole the girls’ attention and affection as they stared in awe at the figure who flew away like the passing wind.
“Aaaaaaaaaahhhh! My caaaaar!” On the other hand, the guy screamed as the dent Zhang Shaoyu left on his car’s roof.
Just when the guy was going to hurl curses at Zhang Shaoyu, he heard another ‘bang, bang bang’ and the car got an additional three deep dents on its roof. However, this time, the car couldn’t take the pressure and all its windows shattered, leaving the Porsche looking like a trashed wreck.
The three oldies couldn’t care less about the damage they had done, and Lao Zhou asked, “Madam, they entered the school, what do we do now?”
The madam answered, “That girl said this speed up effect will only last about thirty minutes. It’s been more than twenty minutes already. It’s now or never!”
Lao Huang raised his meat cleaver and declared loudly, “Okay! Let’s go!”(6)
Right away, the three oldies cried out and chased after Zhang Shaoyu like a group of bandits.
Looking at the miserable state of the pompous guy, the girls were unable to say anything. One by one they made difficult smiles and left him alone. He muttered in a daze, “I guess it’s time to call 911.”
An old woman who was sweeping the floor heard him and retorted, “What 911? This is China! It’s 119 here! Even if you’re stupid, you should at least have some common sense, don’t you watch any news! Even a cleaner like me is smarter than you…”
This proved to be the final straw. The pompous boy couldn’t keep it together and he snapped, falling to the ground, fainting cleanly away.
TRANSLATOR’S NOTES :
Actually, something about molecules but I think it didn’t fit.
It’s just holding hands. C’mon…
Yes, 1060. Author please. And My Youth (Car) Roof Jumping SNAFU!
It actually said crouching tiger hidden dragon. Go watch.
I’m tempted to put “FOR SPARTAAAAA!”